Thursday, February 19, 2009

I guess I've been doing it wrong?

Survivor features a really, really big tool this year. I dislike him more than last season's Ace, and that's saying something.

He's a soccer coach from Missouri. He goes by "Coach."

Anybody who asks that anyone other than the players on his team call him "coach" because he's a coach is a pretty significant lameass right there.(*)

But his sense of what a coach does is even more bizarre.

He was referring to a fellow contestant when he uttered this head-scratcher:

"She has a personality that's the same as mine. She looks to find faults in other people. I do it because it's my job."

Nice! It's the job of a coach to find faults in other people! That's what I do every time I coach debate, is say "Here are your faults, kids!" Then I go home.

Later in the same episode, he said this:

"It's my job to get people to trust me."

There's no better way to get people to trust you than my listing their faults for them, one at a time. Try it sometime. Then maybe--just maybe--you'll be every bit as unlikeable as Coach.

*The only exceptions I can think of to this rule--guys who I think can be called "Coach" by the general public--are Mike Krzyzewski, John Wooden, and Ernie Pantusso. The former two by virtue of earning their nicknames through years of exemplary work; the latter who, while a coach, was called Coach because he never flew first class.

1 comment:

swankette said...

People don't call Mike Krzyzewski "Coach" they call him "Coach K" which is, in my opinion, part term of endearment and part 'please don't make me try to pronounce that last name!' And which is different than simply calling someone "Coach."