Saturday, February 19, 2005

Amazing Race 7 Predictions

My honey has already predicted this season's race, and is ordering me to do the same. Like hers, these predictions are based solely on the brief biographies CBS has left. In the interests of time, I will give only a 10-word summary of my first impression of each team before telling you how I think the race will shake down.

Brian and Greg: Best athletes ever on show. Will make critical, tragic mistake.

Debbie and Bianca: I wish my high school teachers all looked like Bianca.

Lynn and Alex: Bio disturbing. Alex isn't out to parents--and on TV???

Megan and Heidi: Are they for real? Afraid to fly, never traveled before?

Meredith and Gretchen: Meredith's the most athletic old guy in world. Cannon fodder.

Ray and Deana: Ray's the early favorite for guy I'll want to disembowel.

Rob and Amber: Sick and wrong. Your main job should be "reality contestant."

Ron and Kelly: Iraq POW and Miss South Carolina. He'll keep them competitive.

Ryan and Chuck: Combined, they have 5 chins, so I think they're eliminated.

Susan and Patrick: Good to have a mother/son team. Won't last long.

Uchenna and Joyce: He's from Enron, she's from Worldcom. They're owed some karma.

Well, I see this as breaking down to three groups: the no-hopers, the not-good-enoughs, and the in-it-to-the-end. Now there's usually some exceptions to the anticipated order...for instance, last season, Lena and Kristy were a very strong team who were eliminated in an early dumb-luck challenge, and Adam and Rebecca lasted all the way to the finish line in spite of having no apparent skills. But in general, it'll look like this:

GONE IN THE FIRST FOUR WEEKS (if you made me predict the order, this would be it, but I'm mostly just predicting that these will be the first four out):

Lynn and Alex (my baby and I agree on this one...there are SO MANY red flags in this bio...)

Susan and Patrick (parent/child teams usually are too uneasy about who makes decisions)

Megan and Heidi (I can't see their breasts, but from their face shots, I would bet my next paycheck they have implants)

Meredith and Gretchen (he's a stud in spite of his girly name, but still, the geriatric set tend not to make it more than 4/5 episodes)

Then come the middle-of-the-roaders:

Ryan and Chuck (about here is where their lack of athleticism will catch up)

Brian and Greg (could go anytime, actually...it's just a matter of when they'll make their inevitable impulsive, silly, act-first-without-thinking mistake)

Rob and Amber (Not sure their skills are a good match for this game)

Uchenna and Joyce (A few too many issues...strained relationship, just a tad too old...for me to put them in the final three).

This leaves me with the following in the final three:

Rob and Deanna (I think some of the earlier teams might be a little better, but I can't imagine a final three with three teams I think I'll like...so I'll pick one team I suspect I won't like).

Ron and Kelly (I admire them both from their bio, but I just don't think that they'll be able to pull this off...the beauty queen factor still turns me off, even though a couple of beauty-queen-and-boyfriend teams have won now).

Which leaves me with a little bit of an upset at the top: Debbie and Bianca. I think they're young enough to be athletically competitive, cute enough to get help whenever they need it, worldly enough to have a sense of what to do in bizarre situations, and smart enough to avoid the big mistake. They'll avoid last place for the whole trip and will manage to be stronger and faster than the female members of the second-place and third-place teams. They'll win the million.

Two years ago, the team I picked finished dead last. Last season, they were middle of the pack, but ahead of my baby's pick. This season, I've got it baad, got it baad, got it baaaad. I'm hot for teacher! She's going all the way! Oh yeah, and that red-headed friend of hers, too!

Man, I love this show, even after the ugliness of last season. If you don't watch it, start next week. It's totally addictive.

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